Most of us love a pat on the back, a hug, to hold hands with our loved one or as parents with our children. Touch helps us communicates love, care, friendship, affection and compassion for one another when used correctly.
Touch Plays A Critical Role In Parent-Child Relationships
Touch plays a critical role in parent-child relationships. From the moment of birth, touch has been described as an essential element for the emotional development, growth and health of infants. A mother’s touch enhances bonding between mother and child and is also used as a method of communication that also works to provide the child with a level of security. Touch helps mothers and fathers to show love affection towards their children.
Touch Is Also A Powerful Healing Component For Adults
When comforting a friend with a hug can make a huge difference to an emotionally distraught person. Human beings are hardwired to connect with others on a basic physical level. Studies have shown that the human touch has biological and psychological components that can have a profound impact on our physiological health. This works by calming the nervous system, steadying the mind, lowering the respiratory rate and also lowering the heart rate.
The Power Of Touch Also Applies To Some Species Of Animals
Some animals love being touched, patted or caressed by their owners such as dogs and cats. The young of certain animal species thrive on the power of touch.
Harry Harlow a University psychologist from the 1950’s and 60’s studied ‘attachment’ and the effects of ‘social isolation’ on Rhesus monkeys. He found how touch healed a baby monkeys from the distress and trauma they were experiencing after having being removed from their mothers, as separated monkeys had become listless and withdrawn. In that time of separation, even though the monkeys were being regularly fed and were taken care of, their lack of touch was quite distressing to them. Upon returning them to their mothers the baby monkey’s behavior changed as they regained their peace.
How Touch Can Become Toxic
Unwanted touch is immediately uncomfortable. Not all unwanted touch is toxic. Such as a hug from a friend. We need to keep in mind that we aren’t all huggers, and if those who are being hugged are uncomfortable we need to stop hugging them. However inappropriate touch is toxic, disrespectful and selfish in its intent as it infringes on another person’s rights. This type of unwanted touch is a serious boundary to cross, having serious psychological consequences for the recipient. Toxic touch is a form of abuse.
Sandra Ciminelli
Cred. Dip.Couns. (Christian)
Sources
Dr Caroline Leaf
Harlow H. F., Dodsworth R. O., & Harlow M. K. (1965). Total social isolation in monkeys.
Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America.
Retrieved from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC285801/pdf/pnas00159-0105.pdf
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